Tips, Inspiration and Updates

Dealing with negative people

We all have people in our lives that aren’t always full of the joys of spring, or simply having a down day but there are often really negative people who take your energy. I like to call them drains.  

None of us are perfect. We all make mistakes and we can all be negative, judgemental, self-centred or jealous at times. And that is OK. We are all human.

What does matter, however, is that we are willing to work on ourselves, to grow and to try harder to be better people.

But if there is someone in your life who is not willing to do that, it is time to think about removing yourself from that person. You need to stop allowing the same people to hurt and disappoint you over and over again.

There are various types of people who are potentially poisoning your life: the one I am going to focus on this blog is those who spread negativity- you all know someone who is always angry, resentful and unhappy.

If so, you can probably feel them sucking the life out of you by imposing their negativity and pessimism upon you.

Being around people, who complain 24/7 and always see the life as a glass half empty, is not only not fun, it’s also dangerous for you.

If you hang out with these people too often, you are likely to develop negative thinking yourself or even get depressed.

And we all know how important it is to focus on the positive to attract better things into our lives.

And here are a few tips in case you can’t really stop hanging out with negative people (for example, if they are work colleagues or family members):

Negativity feeds on attention. So, don’t give negative people much attention. Keep things brief, if you have to listen to them don’t ask questions and don’t engage.

Be honest, and if you can, tell them that they are being negative. You need to actively set boundaries and let the people know that you do not want to listen to their negativity.

Use “positivity triggers” to eliminate negativity. For example, listening to your favourite song or reading positive quotes can help. Anything that can help you redirect your thoughts.

Be aware of your own reality. If you’re not negative, and you don’t have to be. Don’t let other people influence you and make you “see the glass as half empty”.

Steer away from conflicts. Don’t waste your time or energy in engaging in the drama. Walking away from a conflict doesn’t make you weak, on the contrary, it makes you stronger.

See negative people as opportunities for growth. They can teach you to be resilient to negativity and to appreciate the good things in your life.

Realise who is really important in your life. These negative people are not. And even though you may be forced to be around them, they do not have to become a big part of your life.

Be around people who are positive and bring out the best in you.

Carole x

Life Coach, Mindfulness Practitioner and Self Care Coach.

Carole Haywood-Poole