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Drains and Radiators

There are all sorts of people we spend time with, and I have found that in terms of energy , there are two types of people, some are drains and some are radiators.

Let me share why. There are some people that are always wanting your time, often these people drain your energy, hence I refer to them as drains.

It’s ok to be spending lots of time with those special people in your life, the ones who provide warmth and support, I like to call them radiators.

But sometimes there are people who just constantly want our attention just for the sake of getting attention.

They are not helping you develop and grow, they are just wasting your time. Don’t let them.

A few things you can do…

If at work – require an agenda for meetings. If outside work – make sure you know why you are meeting up with someone and what they want to talk about.

State your preferred method of communication. For example, tell the person that you prefer to chat via WhatsApp or messenger and don’t feel bad about not picking up the phone.

Set time limits. Just tell the person that you have to be somewhere in half an hour.

Hang out with them in a group rather than alone. This way you will always be able to talk to someone else instead.

Then there are those people who might simply be jealous, these too are draining.

Sure, it’s sometimes nice to know that someone is a little envious because it makes you feel even better about your success.

But some people are constantly jealous, they are never happy with what they have, and they will never be happy when good things happen to you.

They will keep sending toxic and negative vibrations out of envy, because from their point of view that good thing that happened to you should have happened to them.

You want to surround yourself with people who will support you and who will help you move forward.

This may seem obvious, but unfortunately, so many of us hang on to that person in our lives who just don’t seem to care about us.

It may be because we are just not ready to let go yet or because we are hoping something will change, but the reality is that there is no reason to keep someone in your life if they are not interested in it.

There are also people who just pretend to care about you. But sooner or later everything becomes about them. They are simply being self centred and will also drain you.

So, if you are spending a lot of time with someone, just make sure that they are not just “taking” but also “giving” something in return. If the person is trying to make  everything about themselves, they are not worth it. Spend more time with radiators than drains and watch your energy increase !

Carole x

Carole Haywood-Poole